By Jane Fryer
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Maybe it?s the troupe of bikini-clad cheerleaders who keep dashing out to dance the conga and writhe on all fours.
Or it could be the Benny Hill theme tune that blasts out every time the linesmen rush forward to rake the sand off the red court lines.
Or perhaps it?s the DJ yelling: ?This? isn?t Wimbledon, you?re allowed to make some noise here!?
Whatever it is, women?s beach volleyball is not your average Olympic sport.
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Victorious: Zara Dampney, left, from Great Britain celebrates with her teammate Shauna Mullin, right, after defeating Canada in their Beach volleyball match on Sunday
The British pair, the country's first female representatives in this sport at the Olympics since 1996, impressed on their way to a 17-21 21-14 15-13 victory
Celebration: British team Shauna Mullin and Zara Dampney celebrate their victory over Canada yesterday, while left, Dampney dives for the ball during the match
And when Great Britain?s Shauna Mullin and Zara Dampney jog through the drizzle and a tunnel of cheerleaders into the amazing purple 15,000-seat temporary stadium in Horse Guards Parade, it feels a long way from Chariots Of Fire.
When Olympic tickets went on sale in the ballot, beach volleyball was one of the most oversubscribed events, second only to the 100 metres final. A year on, it remains the hot ticket of the Games.
Or, at least, the women?s beach volleyball does. No one seems quite so interested in the men.
It could, of course, be due to the fact that the women display mesmerising skill, above and beyond their male peers.
Sights and sounds: The Olympic beach volleyball tournament kicked off yesterday in the historic heart of the UK capital. However, spectators' eyes were firmly fixed upon the athletes and their toned bodies
Wet and wild: The heavens open over the Women's Beach Volleyball Preliminary Round match between Kikiana Steiner Fernandez and Elsa McMillan Baquerizo of Spain and Marleen van Iersel and Sanne Keizer of the Netherlands at Horse Guards Parade
A true taste of British summer: Dark skies during Men's Beach Volleyball Preliminary match between Spain and the Netherlands
Nail biter: The Spaniards came from behind to beat their Dutch rivals 14-21 21-16 15-11.? Elisa Baquerizo embraces teammate Liliana Fernandez, rear, after their win
Italy's Marta Menegatti returns the ball during a beach volleyball match against Russia earlier today, before the rain started falling
Russia's Evgeniya Ukolova hits the sand during the match against Italy, which the Italians won in straight sets
But it is more likely to be because men play in singlets, baseball hats and baggy knee-length shorts while the women wear very, very, very small bikinis. Or at least they do when the temperature is above 16C. Regulations dictate that when it?s colder than this, they can wear shorts.
Yesterday afternoon, with thermometers bobbing at a perilous 17C, this revelation was a source of grave concern amongst a group of four men drinking pink champagne from plastic glasses at the bar until the men?s matches had finished.
?Why would they do that to us? Why would they ruin our Olympic experience? This is the only thing we wanted tickets to!? gasped Jonathan, a shipbroker from London.
Fortunately, his fears were never realised. As a beach volleyball virgin, I have no idea whether London in the rain has the same je ne sais quoi as the sun-kissed beaches of Ipanema, or Santa Monica. Though I assume the cheerleaders don?t usually stand shivering in dressing gowns between dances.
But it doesn?t matter. It is the noisiest, most colourful, bonkers, flesh-revealing thing you can imagine. A bit like the old Saturday night TV show Gladiators, but louder, more shouty and in bikinis with lager.
Bonkers: A group of dancers use beach balls during their routine to keep spectators entertained at the beach volleyball
What a show: Cheerleaders perform during Women's Beach Volleyball on Day 1 of the London 2012 Olympic Games at Horse Guards Parade
Beach party vibe: Cheerleaders' dance performances were greeted with cheers as enthusiastic as any those granted any of the sporting prowess on display
Intermission: The dancers emerged onto the court between matches, as the MC whipped the crowd into a frenzy
And it?s really fun to watch.? Every time a point is scored the music blasts ? anything from Queen to The Proclaimers, Beyonce to The Rolling Stones.
The rules are brilliantly simple. There are two players on each team and the aim is to ?ground? the ball on your opponent?s side of the net, or prevent them from returning it. The first team to reach 21 points wins the set and the best of three sets wins the match.
Players can ?flick? the ball to each other up to three times on their side before ?spiking? it across the net.
And yes, Federation Internationale de Volleyball really do stipulate that the bottom half of female competitors? kit can feature ?no more than 6cm of cloth at the hip? ? unless it?s cooler than 16 degrees.
So it?s vital to have a body that is tanned, smooth and hairless. There?s nothing that moves, wobbles, ripples or bulges. And they all wear make-up and jewellery and patriotically painted nails.
The bodies come at a price. For Dampney and Mullin it was more than four hours of training six days a week for the past five years. They don?t drink alcohol or eat sweets. 
Xue Chen and Zhang Xi were bronze medallists in Beijing four years ago, are among the favourites for gold this time but made a poor start to their Olympic quest
Good effort: Chen Xue of China dips to return the ball during the match, where they eventually lost to the Russian side
Rolling in the sand: With a look of rapt concentration, China's Zhang Xi waits to return the ball
Acrobatic: Brazil's Juliana Silva dives out of bounds for a spiked ball during their match against Mauritius, from which they eventually emerged victorious
Six-time world champions Larissa Franca and Juliana Silva of Brazil demolished Natacha Rigobert and Elodie Li Yuk Lo of Mauritius 21-5 21-10 in Pool A
Cheeky: Greece's Maria Tsiartsiani signals the strategy to teammate Vasiliki Arvaniti before serving to Switzerland's Nadine Zumkehr and Simone Kuhn during their women's beach volleyball preliminary match
Long-limbed: Greek and Swiss players struggle for the ball during their match
Our boys: Steve Grotowski of Great Britain dives for the ball. He and John Garcia-Thompson went down to a 21-19 21-13 defeat to Joshua Binstock and Martin Reader of Canada
Down in the wet sand, they?re halfway through the first set and the cheerleaders are out of their dressing gowns and doing the conga. Helicopters circle overhead (as pilots presumably lean over for a good gawp), the air is thick with the smell of hotdogs and lager and everyone is cheering.
And when Mullin and Dampney win the second set, everyone?s up on their feet dancing.
Suddenly, we?re winning. GB takes the final set and the crowd goes berserk.
Mullin said recently: ?We don?t play beach volleyball to look good, we play it to win.? And there?s something about the sport that will win you over.
It?s like a brilliant spoof ? a sort of Hugh Hefner bikini Olympics crossed with a ridiculous game show.
It?s not something to take your granny to, or probably even your mum, but it?s a? brilliantly fun afternoon. And we won!
Video: Beach Volleyball fans give mixed reviews of the athletes' attire
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